Former Disneyland mermaid, Edie, shares what it was like to don a tail and swim in the happiest place on earth:
Being a professional mermaid for Walt was nothing to take lightly. The Productions Department measured us from hip to toe for neoprene tails, complete with large flukes, and green starfish bras. We were taught to slither into the Submarine Lagoon from a hidden chamber and dolphin kick underwater to magically surface in the center of the pool. There we sat on a rock and untangled our hair with immense blue and yellow plastic combs, and plucked ersatz lyres.We worked in shifts of two, and traded off hourly.
Each time a submarine passed, we dove underwater to frolic about, hang upside down by spinning our tails, and to wave at curious faces plastered against the portholes. With practice we learned to smile without emitting bubble screens that would distort our faces into repulsive creatures from the deep. For all this we were paid $1.85 an hour - a whopping net of $59.55 each week.
LET ME BE YOU
OMG THAT IS SO AMAZING AND JUST QOI4AUFSHJDI
OMG OMG OMG I WOULD DO THAT FOR FREE! DREAM FUCKING JOB RIGHT THERE